Maybe limit the max concurrent connections postfix is allowed to make (so split up the user ispconfig to (f.e.) ispconfig_adm and ispconfig_mail. Set the mail user to only use X amount of connections, so the server admin nor the website users won't be affected when a server gets hammered by spammers.
Yes, that might be the best option.
I havent seen any negative effects with a high max connection numbers yet on a server. Mysql seems to handle that well and postfix keeps the connections open in sleep state but does not use them that much in comparison to e.g. websites that might have only few open connections but do many queries trough them.